The Independent Uganda: You get the Truth we Pay the Price
COMMENT | Olivia Nalubwama | Here we are. Again. Another round of African leaders embarrassing us on the world stage as if we don’t have enough struggles on our African plate.
African leaders continue to play pretend about making Africa great for Africans by Africans, grandstanding about “African solutions for African problems” while effortlessly suiting up and attending summits about Africa, hosted outside Africa.
The latest in continental Africa wining and dining at the rich man’s table was in Japan for the 9th Tokyo International Conference on African Development (TICAD) held August 20-22. Ba dia, Japan is not near.
Tech Culture Africa observes that no African countries share the same time zones as major Asian nations like Japan. The African Business website, in a July 31 article, ‘How TICAD has nurtured gradual growth of Japan-Africa ties’ notes, “The Land of the Rising Sun lies more than 8,000 kilometres from the nearest part of Africa. To this day there are few direct travel links between Japan and the continent. On top of the physical distance, differences in language and culture have complicated efforts to strengthen ties.”
But such is the sacrifice of African leaders – comfortably flying long hours over homegrown and historical messes in their own countries to pontificate in Japan about how Africa does not want aid but trade and other stories they spout smoothly.
Of course, back in the motherland, they stand like African warriors at their imperial podiums and spew decolonization tropes about “Africa rising”, how the future is African, how Africa’s time is now, blah blah blah!
One wonders if the African leaders, as they waited in their luxurious VIP lounges at the airports, noticed the groups of forlorn-looking young people (women especially) dressed in Islamic dress, young people in their prime, leaving Africa to make a living as domestic servants in Asia – each one hoping that their story will be different.
Not one of slavery and torture, even death. Unfortunately, the privilege and perks we have accorded our leaders ensure they are heavily shielded from the daily struggles of ordinary Africans.
The African Business article tracing Japan’s journey with Africa (a single country vs an entire continent) reveals that the first TICAD was held in October 1993. Rather modest beginnings, most African delegations were headed by ministers of finance or foreign affairs; only a smattering of presidents showed up.
Those presidents included: Ghana’s Jerry Rawlings, Burkina Faso’s Blaise Compaoré and our own – President Yoweri Museveni. 1993 is long gone, along with Rawlings (died in 2020) and Compaoré (ousted in 2014). The cherubic-cheeked jet-setting Museveni of 1993, who could do no wrong as one of the ‘new breed of African leaders’, is also long gone.
Now in his 80s, the masked old man in the hat is happy to stay here with us and delegate his ‘fishermen’ ministers. Representing Museveni at the 9th TICAD held on August 20- 22 was our vice president, Jessica Alupo, who delivered Museveni’s remarks in which he called upon his fellow African leaders to embrace innovation to explore alternative ways to stem declining Foreign Direct Investment (FDI) to Africa.
Sounding like he was speaking to his African contemporaries in the plush environs of a swanky summit somewhere in Africa (not in pristine Japan), Museveni stated, “We should think deeply on how to create an enabling environment for the private sector in Africa to thrive; we need to prioritise value addition for agricultural products, minerals, human capital development, artificial intelligence, infrastructural development and tourism…”
While African leaders were hard at work far away from grimy Africa, showboating in Japan, about the great potential within Africa, Uganda was also not sleeping.
On August 20, international news outlets revealed that Uganda had signed a bilateral agreement with the United States (USA) to receive third-country deportees from America. Oddly, despite the Foreign Affairs state minister’s rebuttal that Uganda had not signed any such deal with the USA, news of the deal soon flooded our news headlines.
On August 21, the government of Uganda (GOU), through its X account, announced that the USA and Uganda had inked a deportation deal. Going against the basic tenets of news reporting (and decolonization, if you like) the GOU post only quoted American sources.
“Documents obtained by CBS News, which is headquartered in New York City, indicate Uganda recently agreed to accept deportees from the USA who hail from other countries on the continent, as long as they do not have criminal histories.”
The ministry of Foreign Affairs (MoFA) later clarified that the agreement is in respect to non-Americans who may not be granted asylum in the USA and are reluctant to return to their countries of origin.
MoFA further added that Uganda would not be accepting criminals and unaccompanied minors – highlighting Uganda’s stated preference for individuals from Africa. I fervently wish us success in our MoFA endeavors.
In July, the USA department of Homeland Security assistant secretary tweeted that a deportation flight to Eswatini had removed “individuals so uniquely barbaric that their home countries refused to take them back”.
The tweet continued, “These depraved monsters have been terrorizing American communities but thanks to [President Donald Trump] they are off of American soil”. Other countries that have signed deportation agreements with the USA include: Eswatini, Rwanda South and Sudan. Outside Africa, El Salvador has received 300 migrants of Venezuelan origin, for the tidy sum of $6 million, Al Jazeera reported.
Dear reader, one must admit $6 million is quite an alluring figure – for that amount, we might happily sell off our parliament and fill it with proper barbarians. At least then we could own the parliament as opposed to its current state, where the parliament speaker has said publicly her number one priority is to ensure parliament does not give President Museveni sleepless nights.
Dear reader, pay attention to the countries the USA is looking at for its deportees, countries that the current American government, in its first term of office, referred to as ‘sh*thole countries’, countries that the same American administration is doing the ‘mostest’ to prevent its sh*thole citizens from reaching the golden American shores.
Poverty is debasing. It will have you and your weak passport colonized at home and abroad. Did you know that in colonial times, colonisers had a spiffy remedy to curb their growing criminal populations?
According to Encyclopedia Virginia, in 1615, Britain began exporting its criminals to its colonies, where they were sold just like slaves from Africa. The History Press website, in a 2019 article, noted that between 1718 and 1775, over 52,000 convicts were transported from the British Isles to America, to be sold as slaves.
While slave owners happily welcomed the influx of cheap labour, the colonies were less than enthused about receiving Britain’s “rubbish.” History Press recounts then American president, Benjamin Franklin’s revulsion over the matter.
Franklin suggested that since the British thought shipping their convicts to America could reform them, the Americans, in return, should send shipments of rattlesnakes to Britain.
He remarked that the emptying of Britain’s jails into American territories was ‘an insult and contempt, the cruelest perhaps that ever one people offered another…’ Thus, imagine how surprised the modern age of 2025 must be now that Uganda is set to receive America’s ‘convicts.’
A return to the swashbuckling days of hard- nosed colonialism, anyone? The Southern Africa Litigation Centre has condemned America’s actions as exploitative and tantamount to treating the continent as a dumping ground. Yet, hope remains. In July, Nigeria said ‘no thanks’ to American pressure to receive deportees.
In a chef’s kiss rebuttal, the Nigerian Foreign Affairs minister Yusuf Tuggar quipped, “We already have over 230 million people…In the words of the famous U.S. rap group Public Enemy — you’ll remember a line from Flavor Flav: ‘Flavor Flav has problems of his own. I can’t do nothing for you, man.’”
Let us revisit the context; as African leaders met in Japan, far away from Africa to discuss “African solutions for African problems”, somewhere else, countries from the “sh*thole” continent were doing brisk business with America, willingly stepping up to make America great again, cementing their own “sh*thole” status.
At TICAD, Museveni’s speech highlighted the need for creative approaches to address falling FDI in Africa. Our creative solution cannot continue to be attending non-African summits about Africa to talk about how much others want to help Africa rise when African leaders themselves are not rising to the long and arduous work of building Africa so that Africans do not have to risk deadly journeys across punishing deserts, murderous traffickers, tumultuous oceans; all in a bid to seek better opportunities outside Africa.
Our creative approaches to harnessing Africa’s potential cannot be reduced to African countries unilaterally becoming the dumping ground for richer countries.
If we must be America’s Kiteezi (we know how Kiteezi ended – in tears), at least, let us host an African summit for Africans in Africa and invite the deified international community and other thirsty countries baying for our lack of shame.
If we must sell ourselves, let us do it properly in full African regalia and our sacred cultural values, complete with vigorous music and dance. Let’s even throw in a safari tour of prospective dumping grounds.
With every summit summoning African leaders to meet outside Africa to discuss Africa, Africans agonizingly wait on African leaders to renounce their commitment to keeping Africa shackled to aid summits and deals that degrade us. Dear African leaders, please pick a struggle – preferably a noble struggle. Please pick Africans!
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Olivia Nalubwama is a “tayaad Muzukulu, tired of mediocrity and impunity” smugmountain@gmail.com
THIS ARTICLE WAS FIRST PUBLISHED IN THE OBSERVER
